Welp, RIP to John Gruden. My prevailing tinfoil hat theory is that someone on the Chiefs has been holding onto these emails for a long time, and just waited for the right time to drop them. Turns out the Chiefs might not be so great, and KC is having a hard time accepting that.

It's a good thing no one else has access to the old message boards from this league, because there was some heinous shit posted back in the day. At this point if one of us were to release it -- it's mutually assured destruction.

It takes a big controversy to distract us from the Urban Meyer saga, and he's looking at Gruden with a big fat thank you right now. I saw something that said 33% of the players on the Miami team that Meyer coached are either dead or arrested, and some both -- looking at you Aaron Hernandez.

I would've said the Bills are the AFC favorite until the Ravens came back to win on Monday night. They've both won 4 in a row and are looking like they can handle almost anything thrown at them, and the Ravens have a group of bundled sticks for running backs.

The Rams were the NFC favorites, until my boy Kyler and the Cardinals turned into the Scott's of the league and have found a loophole to send their losses elsewhere -- mostly to Detroit. But, let's be honest, the Lions were never gonna win anyway.

Now to our league:

Joe decided to say I don't even need a healthy running back and I'm still gonna take a run at the single week record (220.44 held by me), and put up 210 points this week. He's starting to turn things around? Weird to see.

Scott has turned into Jeff Bezos and decided to pillage his way into the 1%. Time for someone to hand him a loss. I was very surprised to see it was almost Jordan.

David didn't get the memo that you're not allowed to win your first year in the league or else we kick you out. Time to trade away your 3 RB1s to me so you can stay within the league rules. Sorry, I don't make the league rules -- I just enforce them with no regard for their original intent.

There's 7 teams at 2-3. This is Biden's middle class people. We need to take action. Take a page out of Joe's book and definitely throw your vote away -- I mean -- give your vote to a completely viable 3rd party candidate with no fringe values or shady history whatsoever.

Week 1 Perfect Lineup:
QB: Lamar Jackson (Scott, 44.04pts)
WR: Davante Adams (Joe, 38.1pts)
WR: Mike Williams (Jordan, 35.5pts)
WR: Marquise Brown (Scott, 26.1pts)
RB: Derrick Henry (Josh, 32pts)
RB: Jonathan Taylor (Chu, 31.4pts)
TE: Mark Andrews (Jordan, 37.2pts)
WRT: Austin Ekeler (David 30.4pts)
QWRT: Justin Herbert (Boyer 43.86pts)
K: Greg Joseph (FA, 19.5pts)
DEF: Buffalo (Chu, 20pts)

Total: 358.1pts (Jesus christ this was heavy)

Week 5 Matchup of the Week (Chu v Brett):

You'd think I'd pick Scott's matchup -- but it's a foregone conclusion he's gonna be 6-0 after this week.

My biased opinion:
QB -- Burrow v Brady -- Burrow literally got his throat kicked in last week. But, he's at Det this week so he's gonna be fine. Brady has got a short week at Philly, those games are always sloppy. I hate to, but I'm giving this to Burrow.
RBs -- Taylor/Robinson v Gibson/Williams -- This one is pretty even. Call it a coin flip. McCaffrey will likely be back this week, so I'd give this one to Chu if he's confirmed healthy.
WRs -- Metcalf/Godwin/Player X v McLaurin/Moore/Brown - Gotta hand this to Brett. AJ comes off a pitch count post-injury, McLaurin is off/on week to week, and this one is the on Week if trend continues. DJ Moore had one aberration, and should be back on track.
TEs -- Hock v Higbee -- Hock, and I'm a Rams homer.
WRT -- Edmons v Diggs -- Uhh, yeah that's Diggs.
K - Who gives a shit.
D - Pit is ranked #2? And Denver is against a ship without a captain.

Final thought: Once Chu sets his lineup with whatever WR he picks up and gets CMC back in, I think he takes it, but it will be close.

Betting line: Chu (-5)

Good luck in Week 6 boys. Full power rankings will be out tomorrow.