Now with more tables!

I was curious for my own sake how often 0-3 teams make the playoffs for our league specifically. While I was looking back, I also noted 1-3 teams just for comparison's sake. The results? It's not good for 0-3. Joe is the exception that's won a championship after starting off 0-3. Out of 24 teams that started 0-3, only 5 have made the playoffs. That's slightly better than a 20% chance with a pretty small sample size.

The outlook is better for 1-3, and there's a larger sample. Out of 59 teams that started 1-3, 34 have made the playoffs. That's ~57% chance of making the playoffs. Usually the absolute minimum threshold to get in is to get to 6 wins given a 13 game regular season. Now that we're at 14, 7 wins is much safer. For 0-3 teams, that means now you have to win 7 of your next 11 matchups. Achievable yes, but very difficult. Mike, it's up to you or me to change the story. Thankfully Joe already did. I know how much you love comparing yourself to Joe.

Last week had a wild finish. Especially in the Boyer/Scott matchup. Boyer has come out by the skin of his balls in back to back weeks now. Jordan sits alone at the top for the first time since 1987 so he definitely feels good about that. Joe has a gorilla grip on most points currently, and is almost +200 points above last points (me).

Matchup of the week: Joe v Scott
Joe has firmly taken the lead for most points, and Scott just barely lost his undefeated streak to Boyer, who may take this season's "streak killer" title. The biggest and best showdown in this whole matchup is Josh Allen vs Lamar Jackson, and they happen to be playing each other. I would bet whichever QB comes out on top wins the matchup for Joe or Scott. Good luck to you both.

Power Rankings

Team Notes:

Jordan: 2 of the overall top 10 scoring players on his team (Hurts & Waddle). Averaging 154.63 points a week. Scary across the board except for Cousins who gets afraid of his own shadow on Monday night. If Mixon or McCaffrey pulls it together his team is really unstoppable. Depth is pretty good. Someone's gotta take you down. Brett hasn't been a huge threat, but this matchup is projected to be the highest this week.

Joe: Still bitter at you for taking my record for single week most points. I had a dream that I'd take it right back the week after, and then I put up barely 100. Starters are amazing. Depth is honestly pretty rough. Any major injuries and you're pretty shit out of luck. Doesn't seem to matter as long as Lamar is playing out of his mind. If you don't survive the hurricane I promise I will take care of your team and place them lovingly on my roster. <3

Josh: The copium that Kansas City was inhaling after seeing Mahomes lose to the Colts was just absolutely delicious to watch. "Oh Mahomes is sensitive when the weather changes." "His baby is 1 year old now he's not getting good sleep." Y'all lost, move on. Last week I hated your receivers. Now I don't? Wilson hasn't shown what he's like with Wilson yet...and Olave showed his draft capital. Keep it up I guess.

Brett: You and I both love DJ Moore. But, maybe deep down we have a history of neglect, and therefore love to depend on someone who will never show up. Too real? My bad. Maybe it's not actually his fault though. Maybe Baker actually is the problem. ARob is currently in your flex this week. So, that means he's gonna suck. I think you need to cut another Moore and therefore another exclamation point from your name. Do us all a favor and beat Jordan though. Noting that you cut a Moore as I was writing this post.

David: I don't have much to say about your team. I don't understand it, and it makes me mad. I know you hand picked your players, but it feels like you just autodrafted. And you're 2-1. Hail #teamAutoDraft. Dalvin and Tua might be out this week, and if so, you're fucked. I'd try to trade with you, but I'd spend 65% of the negotiations reminding you of which player is on which team. I ain't got time for that. Good thing Henry finally showed up.

Scott: Slipped down in the rankings mostly because of the loss, and you left a lot on the bench last week. Wilson is the biggest suspect on your team. Bronco's Country. Let's ride. Jamaal Williams somehow proving that old RBs can still be workhorses despite us all not believing it. Good thing to note as we all reach geriatric age.

Chu: Fournette lied. The TDs were not coming. Maybe this week. Mac Jones definitely isn't playing this week, which means you're starting...Matt Ryan. He feels like the Fat Free Plain Greek Yogurt of fantasy football. You screenshotted your team's score last week. It was literally a team average of ~10pts per player. That's the fantasy equivalent of trying to jerk it to the JC Penny lingerie catalogue. That would mean you didn't get it delivered cause they don't print them anymore. It means you found it...like, in a doctor's office, and decided to rub one out in the parking lot before you drove home after getting your cholesterol checked. Don't be like Chu friends. Porn is free.

Boyer: Fuck you. 🥰

Mike: I'm refusing to analyze both your and my team until we get a win. And get a new team name for god's sake.

Will: See above.

This Week by the Numbers:

Highest points in loss:
David: 127.94

Biggest blowout:
Joe over Will: +48.28

Lowest points in win:
Boyer: 116.3

Narrow victory:
Boyer over Scott: +0.12

Overall Wins (if you played every team every week):

This Week's Lineup Efficiency:

Team points by Week:

This week's perfect lineup:

Good luck in Week 4 boys! Redzone Watch party again on Sunday! Come enjoy the misery.